Top Ten Reasons Everyone Should Have At Least One Cat

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday. 

1. You need someone responsible to take charge of your life.
2. An empty lap is a cold, lonely lap.
3. The top of your television looks bare.
4. Everyone should have a pet that silently stares at them for no reason.
5. You bought a lot of lint brushes at Costco and you're anxious to use them.
6. You have stairs and want someone to play "trip me if you can" with you.
7. Cats won't besiege you when you come home from work; wanting walks, playtime, treats, etc. (indeed, they won't even acknowledge that you came through the door).
8. You enjoy watching animals run full-speed from one room to the next for no reason.
9. ... waking to the sweet sound of contented purring in your ear.
10. The shelters and rescues have an abundance of beautiful, loving cats that need homes.  Adopt a cat, save a life!

Kitten Rescue

http://www.laanimalservices.com/

http://animalcare.lacounty.gov/

Top Ten Reasons Cats Don't "Do" Water

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday.

1)         They're cats, they don't "do" anything
2)         There's no way a cat is going to dog-paddle
3)         They know what they look like wet
4)         There are no cool dive & fetch contests for cats, so why
            bother
5)         They [usually] don't weigh enough for an effective cannonball
6)         Cats can't chase balls or sticks in the ocean – (they'd wash
            away)
7)         They think they should walk on water, not splash around in it
8)         The myth of the dreaded "cat fish" (would you swim if there
            was a "human fish"?
9)         Umm, things look 25% larger underwater, dogs swim – can
            you say “Jaws with fur”?
10)       Actually, they do, they just don't want you to know….

Top Ten Reasons My Fat Tabby Should NOT Run for President

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday.

1. My tabby's name is "Puck." Too many easy puns there.
2. A Cat President would be chaos - dogs would never stand (or sit, or roll over) for it.
3. All the fancy White House Christmas tree ornaments would end up under refrigerators and couches.
4. Too many embarrassing You Tube videos would surface.
5. Puck's not likely to stay awake during any Cabinet meetings (or any meetings), anytime, anywhere.
6. He is likely to cough up hair balls during State Dinners.
7. Puck would "make cookies" in the hairpieces of foreign dignitaries.
8. He would bestow Kennedy Center Honors upon Keyboard Kitty and Spaghetti Cat.
9. He's easily bribed .... with tuna flakes, Pounce ... kibble ...
10. We've had too many fat cats in the White House already.

ADOPT, FOSTER OR RESCUE A SHELTER CAT

Cat Connection - LA

Kitten Rescue

Stray Cat Alliance

Top Ten Reasons I Love My Kitties

A new Top Ten List is posted every Monday.

1. If I don't love them, who will?
2. I never need to set my alarm, they always wake up hungry (and loud).
3. They supposedly help keep the bugs under control.
4. They purr me to sleep on sleepless nights.
5. They refuse to wear little designer outfits.
6. Unlike other cats, they will eat just about anything.
7. I don't have to take them for walks and they don't want to go for car rides.
8. They keep the little dogs in check.
9. They keep the big dogs in check.
10. They secretly love me back, they just don't want anyone to know.

Nighttime is the Right Time for Cat Fights

What is it about the sweet silent serenity of midnight, the beautiful bliss of 2 A.M., that causes my cats to think "Hm mm, this just might be the right time to gather under mom's bed and fight?"  What makes my cats think that 2 A.M. is the perfect time for ear-splitting caterwauling?  Do they not think that I, too, would occasionally like to enjoy that activity which they do in abundance, that activity being sleep ....


At times the under-the-bed cat fights are foreshadowed by ominous growling which I am unable to curb with my words.  I must climb out of bed and poke around beneath my bed with a souvenir hockey stick.  Not my favorite witching hour activity.


Other times it seems the cats stumble upon each other accidentally in the dark, and a shrieking match ensues ... right beneath my once-dozing head.


The odd thing is, my cats all get along fine during the day and early evening.  There are no day fights, no afternoon fights, this is strictly a nighttime hobby.  In fact they are often sleeping together on top of my bed.


Sweet dreams?  If only ...

 

Top Ten Reasons Puck Was the Best Cat Ever

A new Top Ten List is posted every Monday.

1. Puck had the most amazing big green eyes.
2. Puck always knew how and when to comfort me.
3. Puck would always acknowledge me when I entered a room.
4. No cat ever purred louder or harder.
5. Puck was Daddy to the other kritters, and was ever-tolerant of those  animals coming and going.
6. Puck wasn’t picky like so many cats are – he’d eat anything.
7. Puck didn’t get into mischief as do most other cats.
8. Puck shared my pillow and purred me to sleep.
9. Puck woke me up by playing with my hair and purring in my ear.
10. God loved Puck even more than I did and he called him home.

R.I.P. 1998- 2012
My Big Beautiful Baby Boy

Dogs Versus Cat Beds

Over the years I have acquired some of the cutest little cat beds ever.  Ultra-soft, plush, gorgeous designer cat beds. 

I have also acquired some very nice dog beds.  It’s too bad that the dogs never use them.  Why?  Because the dogs are always in the cat beds.  And where are the cats?  Anywhere but there.

Cat beds, once “christened” by the cats, are absolutely irresistible to my dogs, like "cat nip."  Yes, the dogs look silly in the cat beds.  But they also look completely content.

Snug in their little cat beds, the dogs are oblivious to the wicked glare of the ousted cats. Because as anyone knows, once soiled with dog scent the cats will never spend time in those beds again.

Dogs vs cat beds. Or is it dogs versus cats, once again?

 

Mr. Bossy Pants Can't Dance

I recently spent a few days visiting with my sister.  And I soon learned that just as with people, you don't know an animal until you live with it. 

My sister has the bossiest cat in the history of Catdom.  He is in charge of everything his big round eyes can see.  He is in charge of the birds outside, the hummingbirds that hide, and the fat pigeons that glide.  Most days my sister's cat and the birds perform a not-so-graceful predator / prey dance which usually culminates in one or the other smashing himself against the window.


Mr. Bossy Pants believes himself to be the boss of all things.  He comes and goes as he pleases, and decides who pets him and when.  He sleeps wherever and whenever he pleases and if someone must sacrifice a pillow or two for Bossy's comfort, so be it.

Not a day goes by that Bossy Pants doesn't prowl the hallway, making sure everything is exactly as he likes it.  He likes to scold people (mostly me) as he surveys his domain, as if to say "I hope you appreciate that I have allowed you into my cat kingdom."

And that is when the birds show up and it's time for Mr. Bossy Pants to dance.  Or hurl himself against the window.  Because Mr. Bossy Pants can't dance.

Keep Your Pets Safe on the Fourth!

The following tips are for dog (and cat) owners to prepare for Independence Day:

• If you are going to a fireworks display, leave your dog at home where he will be the most safe and comfortable.
• Always keep proper identification securely fastened to your dog's collar in case he gets out. Talk to your local shelter about implanting a universal microchip in your pet, and make sure that your veterinary clinic and animal shelter have your correct contact information in their database.
• Don't leave your dog outside. A dog's sense of hearing is acute--about four times more sensitive than humans'.
• Create a special den-like area in your home where your dog feels safe. A properly introduced crate or kennel can be a calming refuge for them.
• Some dogs become destructive when frightened. If you don't use a crate, remove any items in the room which your dog could destroy or which could hurt them if they chewed them.
• Keep your dog away from the front and back doors. Your dog may be under significant stress, which could result in unnecessary injury to others or cause them to dart out the door.
• Keep windows and curtains closed to reduce noise and bright flashes.
• Turn on a TV or radio at normal volume to distract your dog from loud noises and help him to relax.
• If possible, stay with your pet during the majority of the fireworks. A dog often reacts more intensely to loud sounds and flashes of lights when you are not with him.
• Consider hiring a pet sitter to stay with your dog while you are away from home.

 

Have a Safe and Happy Fourth of July

Top Ten Reasons Old Ladies Love Cats

A new Top Ten List is posted every Monday.

1. Cats keep you warm at night and don’t hog the whole bed.
   
   
2. You never have to take cats to the “cat park” or “kitty beach.”
3. You almost never have to potty train cats.
4.  Cats keep themselves (and you) entertained.
5. People will focus on you being a crazy cat lady and overlook all the really crazy things about you.
6. Cats don't make fun of cat lady floppy hats.
7. Cats don't want to go for car rides and hang their head out the window.
8. Old ladies don't need a partner to go "cat dancing" (and contrary to popular opinion, cats are better dancers than dogs).
9. Cats have a staring problem which makes it look as if they're actually listening to you.
10. Cats love old ladies as much as old ladies love cats

Bonded Pairs = Twice the Love

Everyone probably knows the story of the grieving pit bull who would not leave his dead companion.  He sat with his partner for over 14 hours before animal control arrived to take him away.  (Pit Bull Won't Leave Dead Companion)

Sadly, the shelters are full of such bonded pairs, many of them unusual odd couples (Mastiff and Chihuahua, or German Shepherd and Lhasa Apso). Many more are confused seniors who have been together their entire lives, cruelly discarded with little hope of finding a new home.  It's extremely rare that a bonded pair is adopted together, even less so when they are seniors.  Often their only chance, if they have one, is to be rescued.

Anyone who is thinking of adopting or rescuing, why not think of looking for a bonded pair.  Your pets will have each other as company when you're not home, and you won't have to worry about finding a compatible companion when it's time to expand your pet family. 

If you can't find a bonded pair readily available, don't worry - there will surely be a bonded pair that needs a home soon enough.  A bonded pair will give you double the pleasure, and double the love!

Adopt A Bonded Pair From Your Local Shelter

Los Angeles Animal Services

Department Of Animal Care and Control

Top Ten Reasons Dogs Are Better Dancers Than Cats

A new Top Ten List is posted every Monday.

1. Dogs are used to shaking their rear ends.
2. Cats just don't dance.  Period.
3. Dogs will do just about anything for a treat.
4. Dogs will do just about anything.  Period.
5. Dogs have better rhythm (actually, cats have none).
6. Dogs go for car rides and listen to the radio, hence develop a groove for funky dance steps.
7. Dogs will dance with partners, whereas cats are more solitary creatures.
8. Cats can't watch Dancing with the Stars because they're always on top of the television.
9. Cats get too distracted by disco balls (think laser lights x 1000)
10. Cats don't have time to practice as they sleep 23 hours a day.

 Dancing Dogs Video

My Calico Swirl Mean Girl

Most of my cats are female.  And that means I live in the midst of a feline version of "Mean Girls."  And every pack of Mean Girls needs an alpha - in my case, a Top Cat.

My Top Cat is Lillie-Belle.  My petite muted calico, my girlie-girl Lillie-Belle is Rizzo in Grease, she's Pinky Tuscadero from Happy Days.  She's my little one-eyed tough girl from the wrong side of the tracks, my felonious feline.

Lillie-Belle purrs like a locomotive, cuddles like a cougar.  And she chases down any cat (or small dog) that looks at her funny, or sits where Lillie-Belle wants to sit. Or lays where Lillie-Belle wants to lay.

She will swat another cat from my pillow, or use her mean girl squint to scare another from my lap. 

But Lillie-Belle saves her soft side for me.  It's almost like there are two Lillie-Belle's living here.  One's a mean girl, one's a calico swirl.  I'm just glad that I get the calico swirl, my little pearly girl.  Because frankly, I don't want to be the recipient of her scary mean girl squint.

Pillow Talk With Puck

I've been sharing my pillow with Puck for more than 14 years.  Sharing my sleepy time, my dreamy time, my "I-can't-get-out-of-bed-time."  Puck joined my family when he was 8 weeks old, and even then he didn't have a lot of kitten energy.  He's always been kind of a sleepy time guy.

I never have to go looking for Puck.  Puddin hides.  Opie and Little Mess are free range kitties, they could be anywhere at any given time.  And I never know which drawer or cupboard Darwin will be in.

But Puck .... he's usually on my pillow.  Or near my pillow, or somewhere on the bed.  And as I approach I hear his purr revving up, growing ever louder.

It used to annoy me, that loud purr of Puck's.  I used to complain that I couldn't get any sleep with that buzz saw in my ear.  But now, as Puck grows ever older, and the buzz saw grows slowly softer, I can't imagine falling asleep without it.

It's the best sleep aid there is.



Top Ten Reasons There Is No Such Thing as an "Easter Kitty"

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday. If you have a suggestion for a Top Ten list, send it to petpurri@gmail.com. If we use your suggestion we'll send you a prize!

1. Easter Kitty would eat the Easter grass in the basket and puke all over the candy.
2. Easter Kitty might deliver Easter candy.  Or he might not. 
3. The Easter chocolate would melt on top of the television set.
4. Easter Kitty would never don festive Easter garments.
5. Easter Kitty would feel compelled to play with colorful Easter basket goodies that would then end up under the refrigerator.
6. Easter Kitty would make mincemeat out of cute little Easter chicks.
7. Creepy staring Easter Kitty would creep out all the children.
8. Easter Kitty might choose to stay under the bed all day.
9. "Easter Kitty" would get confused with less popular "Easter Bitty."
10. Who says there's not an Easter Kitty?

Doesn't Everyone Have Cats in Their Drawers?

Cat-proofing a home is not easy.  I'm not talking about cat-proofing a home for the safety of the cat, e.g. as one baby-proofs by covering electrical outlets with those funky plastic things.  I'm talking about cat-proofing a home to protect a home from cats ... the kind of cats that can open absolutely anything. 

Cats that open dresser drawers in the middle of the night.  Cats that pry open bathroom cabinets with a clever twist of a polydactyl paw.  Or cats that can somehow slide open a heavy closet door.

And before you know it, every pair of unmentionables has been slept on by a fat tabby, every sock has been snuggled by a sassy snowshoe, and a lint brush has become a fashion accessory.

How do you cat-proof a home?  You can put latches on every cupboard and locks on every door.  Or you can adopt dumb cats. Or you can just accept the fact that life as you once knew it is over.  There are worse things in the world finding than a happy cat in your underwear drawer.

Like not finding a happy cat in your underwear drawer.

 

Top Ten Reasons My Tortie "Twink" Should be Mitt's V.P.

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday. If you have a suggestion for a Top Ten list, send it to petpurri@gmail.com. If we use your suggestion we'll send you a prize!

1. Next to Twink, Mitt looks pretty darn normal.
2. "We're Smitten With Mitten and Kitten" - campaign slogans just don't get any cuter.
3. Awesome "bi" duo - Mitt is bi-coastal, Twink is bi-polar.
4. It's the perfect ticket - a wussy and a pussy.
5. Increased possibility of winning endorsements from Keyboard Kitty and Spaghetti Cat.
6. It Mitt gets caught in a cat house, it will be embarrassing but for all the wrong reasons.
7. Dogs are still too angry and won't accept the nomination if asked.
8. Twink will make fewer verbal gaffes than the current V.P.
9. Twink will easily stay out of trouble since she sleeps 23 hours a day.
10. Twink wouldn't be caught dead in a sweater vest.

Hook, Line and Twinker

I never remember my dreams, so waking to the soggy memory of being a fish on a hook was beyond weird. My top lip felt a little wet.  Not until I opened my eyes and saw Twink staring back at me did it begin to make sense. I had been hooked by one of Twink's paddle-paws.

Twink, my bi-polar tortie, is a polydactyl with ginormous front paws that look more like mittens (or paddles, if one wants to continue with the fish-out-of-water theme). Twink is very possessive of me and would sleep on my face (and has) if I would let her. This habit sometimes causes parts of my face, including my lips, to get snagged in Twink's poly paddle paws as she contentedly plays piano on my person.

So off to work I go, not quite sealed with a kiss, with a little chunk of my lip amiss.

Hook, line and Twinker, caught by a little paddle-footed stinker.  And I can't think of a better way to start the day.



Top Ten Things To Do With Your Pets On A Stormy Day

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday. If you have a suggestion for a Top Ten list, send it to petpurri@gmail.com. If we use your suggestion we'll send you a prize!

 

1. Cuddle with the kritters on the couch and watch bad movies.
2. Put on a doggie couture fashion show (make sure the blinds are drawn).
3. Search under the furniture for all the disappeared catnip mice.
4. Lock yourself in a room with your cats and see who has the biggest staring problem.
5. Sleep.  A lot.
6. Play hide-and-go-seek (and hope you're found within a week).
7. Karaoke a "doggie version" of Jingle Bells – and no it's not true that I am the worst singer in the house.
8. Eat.  A lot.
9. Make totally spontaneous and non-staged You Tube cat videos.
10. Take photos for creepy 2012 Christmas Card (so we don't have to re-use photo from creepy 2011 Christmas Card.

Adopt a Shelter Pet Today - Spend Stormy Days With Furry Friends!

Los Angeles Animal Services

Los Angeles County Care and Control

Top Ten Reasons My Fat Tabby Should NOT Run For President

A new Top Ten list is posted every Monday. If you have a suggestion for a Top Ten list, send it to petpurri@gmail.com. If we use your suggestion we'll send you a prize!

1. My tabby's name is "Puck." Too many easy puns there.
2. A Cat President would be chaos - dogs would never stand (or sit, or roll over) for it.
3. All the fancy White House Christmas tree ornaments would end up under refrigerators and couches.
4. Too many embarrassing You Tube videos would surface.
5. Puck's not likely to stay awake during any Cabinet meetings (or any meetings), anytime, anywhere.
6. He is likely to cough up hair balls during State Dinners.
7. Puck would "make cookies" in the hairpieces of foreign dignitaries.
8. He would bestow Kennedy Center Honors upon Keyboard Kitty and Spaghetti Cat.
9. He's easily bribed .... with tuna flakes, Pounce ... kibble ...
10. We've had too many fat cats in the White House already.

ADOPT, FOSTER OR RESCUE A SHELTER CAT

Cat Connection - LA

Kitten Rescue

Stray Cat Alliance